on the story of wishcake...

Throughout this whole blogging experience, I've had many people ask me where the name "wishcake" came from. I'm not sure why I haven't sat down to write about how I came up with it, especially because if I were in your shoes I'd probably be confused beyond all reason, too.

What the heck does this girl do, anyway? Make baked goods? Grant wishes? Grant wishes involving baked goods? SERIOUSLY. I DON'T GET IT.

And, quite frankly, I don't get it, either. I wish I could even remember how I came up with it. It's a little pathetic, really. When I sit down and actually think about it, the story is kind of boring. The whole thing started when I was sixteen and had to choose a new email address/screen name and sat at the computer for a full twenty minutes, racking my brain for a combination of words that wouldn't involve any of the following things:

1. My name, because even then I was afraid of being murdered by someone on the internet.

2. A word that I love but has already been taken and has to be followed by a combination of sixteen numbers, because I'm entirely too OCD to deal with that mess.

3. Something that would make me sound emo.

4. Anything involving my slowly waning obsession with boy bands, even though I'm pretty sure I was wearing my old Hanson t-shirt at the time.

As I'm sure we've determined by now, I'm really picky and kind of judgemental about things. Things that don't even really matter. (Like the layout of bookshelves, people who can't sing "happy birthday" on key, the kind of cheese that is acceptable on a grilled cheese sandwich, etc.) Needless to say, coming up with a good screen name was very important. I went through a million word combinations and at some point I guess it just clicked. Wishcake. It just worked. It fit. It was random, quirky and something that I was sure nobody else had thought of.

Granted, when I told my dad my new screen name he was all, "Um, if you're hungry we can make you a sandwich, you know." And whenever I had to give out my email to the American Eagle employees while buying something, they'd look at me like, "What? Who are you?" and I'd be all, "Yeah, I don't even know."

In hindsight, I am glad I somehow managed to come up with that random combination of words that would end up meaning a lot more to me down the road. However, surprisingly enough, this blog didn't even start out having anything to do with the word that seems to identify me around this ol' blogosphere.

Since I'm here explaining the whole name thing, I figure I could give you a tiny history of this blog (I know, I'm boring myself right now - it's okay if you want to go finish off that half-pound of fudge you have sitting on your counter; I don't judge). I just know that I've always been interested about how people started out and what inspired them to continue with blogging, so I figure there may be someone out there who is curious about my story.

When I started out this blog in April of 2006 it was called "Simply, me." I didn't have a fancy layout. I didn't have any readers. I wasn't writing for any sort of audience and pretty much just wrote for myself, hence the reason the language wasn't perfect - or the grammar. I didn't update that often. (In fact, if you ever feel the need to dive into the archives it's pretty much just me whining about stuff and wanting a cat. You know, the usual.) I didn't intend to keep this blog around, actually, and had another private online journal somewhere else at the time that I used more often. I didn't even realize there was this whole other bloggy world out there, aside from the basic Livejournal type of thing.

The only reason I started a public blog was a direct result of being inspired by the first blogs I kept track of on a weekly basis (and developed some serious blog crushes on in the process): Whoorl and Love is Blonde.

I wrote and wrote. Mostly for myself. Which I'm thankful for, because I think that when you blog without an audience it's a whole different thing. Your writing is much more pure, in a way, because you aren't worried about what people will think or how it will come across. I'm glad I had a while to grow and develop myself as a blogger, if that makes any sense. Then, after a while, I told a couple friends about my blog. And then a few other people I didn't know started reading. I started reading other blogs and before I knew it, I realized I was a part of a community I had no idea would be so amazing, supportive and inspiring.

When I started writing here, I had no idea that it would end up being such a huge part of my life. It was a very slow progression when it came to developing a readership and discovering all these new friendships along the way. Last year, I decided to buy my own domain and ended up using "your wishcake" as an official blog title. Because, well, if I'm anyone's wishcake, I'm probably yours.

Oh, there she goes with the cheesiness. Typical wishcake! Soon she'll be overusing the word "shenanigans" and calling people peaches!

The rest is history, I suppose.

I can say with all honesty that it's because of this blog and because of the people I've met through this blog that I was brave enough to start selling my crafts. That I developed a love for photography. That I started thinking of myself as a writer and not just a blogger. That I realized I'm braver than I give myself credit for. That I've found the confidence to accept all the wonderful and crazy bits and pieces of who I am.

In the last three years I've gone from a girl who would rant to an empty room about her leaky apartment and newlywed life, to a girl who learned to be brave and share her heart with complete strangers, to a slightly more mature girl who is truly finding her voice and is discovering what life can be when you stop giving yourself limits.

It's kind of amazing when you stop to think about all the tiny, seemingly insignificant choices you make that end up carrying you through your life to a place you never figured you'd be. In the words of Felicity (who I still think I am, on a fairly regular basis):

"Sometimes it's the smallest decisions that can pretty much change your life forever."

So, that's the story of "wishcake". And, for the record, I don't really know how to make a cake - unless we're talking Duncan Hines cake-mix-in-a-box. So whoever it is that keeps emailing me about making them a wedding cake, I CAN'T DO THAT.