April 13, 2009

on being "a Charlotte"...

Samantha: Relationships aren't just about being happy. I mean, how often are you happy in your relationship?
Charlotte: Every day.
Samantha: Every day?
Charlotte: Well, not all day every day - but, yes, every day.

Last night, I finally joined the rest of the female population and watched the Sex in the City movie. Oddly enough, I don't remember ever watching a full episode of the show. I've caught bits and pieces here and there, but I never connected with what I believed was the whole premise of the show. Which, in my head, was simply: casual sex and cosmopolitans. Call me judgemental, but I've never been a fan of either. (I'm aware that I could be quite wrong and/or harsh with my view of the show, considering I've never actually watched it on a regular basis. Also, sometimes I live in a bubble. Just wanted to make that clear.)

Anyway, to be completely honest, I loved the movie. Loved it. I laughed, I cried, I threw my arms in the air and made loud squealing noises, I covered my eyes, I drew my hand to my chest and went, "awwww!". When it was over, I was all, "HOW DID I NOT SEE THIS MOVIE UNTIL NOW?"

Yes, it was quite the experience.

I remember that while working at my first job (a girl's clothing store at the mall) my manager (and also the person I totally wanted to be at that point in life, down to the hibiscus tattoo on her lower back) told me that I was "such a Charlotte". I can't remember if I looked at her with a completely blank look on my face, or just played along like I knew what she was talking about so she would think I was cool - but either way, I've always remembered that comment. And you know what? I see it now. I am totally a Charlotte. Charlotte is one of the biggest reasons that I liked this movie, actually - I really related with a lot of what she said, her general demeanor and...just the way she was, I guess.

In one scene, she is in bed with her husband after a long day of hearing about everyone else's failed relationships. She looks at him and says something to the effect of, "Thank you for being you." Simple as that. It melted my heart.

The quotation at the beginning of this post was also one that really stood out to me. She described married life perfectly. I mean, really, sometimes you literally want to slug your husband, or want to cry because he said something "wrong", or want to scream at the top of your lungs because he left a huge mess in the kitchen that you are left to clean up, or threaten to leave him after he apparently feels the need to fart in front of you like you are some dude.

But those moments are just bits and pieces. I am genuinely happy. Every day. Not all day, every day, as Charlotte points out, but I am definitely happy every day. And that is an incredible thing.

At another point in the movie, Charlotte has a mild freak-out and talks about how there's no way that things can go so well for one person - that she was just waiting for something terrible to happen. Sometimes I have the same thing lurking in the back of my mind. My life hasn't been perfect - I mean, I've had my ups and downs. But, for the most part, it's all just been so amazing. And so easy. I'm so incredibly blessed.

I don't want to sound like I'm bragging or that I think my life is better than anyone else's. I guess that it just feels good to take a step back and realize just how beautiful things are sometimes. It really helps with my general outlook on life.

So, having said that, does anyone want to help me discover a new-found love for cosmopolitans? Because I totally want one right now. Or, maybe just my inner-Charlotte wants one. Either way, let's go.

59 comments :

  1. Sex and the City made me looove cosmopolitans. I've seriously watched the movie about 12 times.

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  2. I didn't ever really get into the 'Sex and the City' craze either, but loved the movie. And completely agreed with Charlotte on more than one occasion. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

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  3. Ahh, I loved the movie! Joe even bought it for me for my birthday.

    And they're making a sequel, although I'm scared it won't be able to live up to the first one.

    Either way, yay for Charlotte's! She's my favorite.

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  4. I loooved that movie. I have it on my computer (my roommate downloaded it...) and once I watched it twice in two days because I was in the mood to watch it soo bad. The end is kind of weird though, she hadn't seen him in SO long, and the last time she saw him he didn't show up at the wedding, yet she agreed to marry him? I don't know about that, but maybe I just haven't met the one that I could feel like that with.

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  5. I bawled my brains out at that movie. Seeing it on opening night in the theatre with a bazillion other women (many whom, by the way, had sipper cups full of cosmos!) was so amazing. We all gasped at the same parts, cheered at the same parts, and yes, sniffles could be heard throughout on the same parts.

    It is so funny how I can totally see a little bit of a certain character in each of my friends. I'm half Charlotte/half Miranda. But slowly but surely I'm becoming more Charlotte. Funny.

    I LOVE COSMOS! One of my 101 things to do is to drink a Cosmo in NYC. Ahhh... if only. :)

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  6. LOVED satc too! I watch it all the time. And that scene where charlotte poops her pants is still funny! I find I always relate to charlotte more but I find that I can relate to each characters story line and thats probably why the show and the movie were so succesful.

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  7. Hi! I just started reading your blog a few days ago but I love it! I've had people tell me I'm a Charlotte as well (although, after I went to watch the entire show after seeing the movie, I found that wasn't always such a good thing). Cosmos, on the other hand, are not something I can relate to! They give me the dizzies for a good 24 hours.
    PS- I see you're reading Geography of Bliss! I just finished it. Don't you just love it?

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  8. Dude... that is so weird! I was watching the Sex and the City movie last night (for the fifth time or so), and I swear I melt every time Charlotte says that line about happiness in a relationship... to me, that is the way a good relationship should feel. I've never been married, but when I am I want to feel that way.

    I am so a Charlotte too! I adore that show... if you ever get the opportunity, you should check out some more episodes! You'll appreciate the themes, beyond the casual sex and cosmopolitans :)

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  9. I just saw the movie myself recently and thought that it was awful! Trust me when I say that the tv show is MUCH BETTER. Netflix the whole series!!!

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  10. I've always wished I was a Charlotte, but I'm definitely a Carrie. Although I really hope I'm not as annoying as her.

    The show (and the movie) had its ups and downs, good and bad, but I figure it's just like a relationship, as Charlotte says.

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  11. Well, let me welcome you to the world of SATC, you think you've watched the movie and left unscathed... but no, you will break and start watching re-runs on TV - and let me warn you PLEASE don't. The tv episodes usually cut out a lot of important plot points that happen with characters other than Carrie or anything that is a little too "sexual" for 11:00 pm even, right...

    Start with Season 1 where you see Charlotte start off as a prudish prim and proper preppy New Yorker and you will see her develop into the well rounded woman you see in the movie.

    God, she had some great episodes "her vagina was depressed", "she discovered the rabbit vibrator", "she double booked a date".....

    Charlotte's character I felt had really grown the most.

    Start with season 1 and work your way through. I love SATC.

    I'll stop now, because this is your blog and not mine. lol
    http://fab.typepad.com

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  12. Never seen the show, never seen the movie, but I'm afraid I'll have to now! I'd be a Charlotte too.
    And I totally feel the same way about my life. How can things go so well? I mean sure, my husband and I have had our ups and downs, but on the whole, its really really REALLY good. And I too keep thinking that the next turn around the corner may lead to something tragic. But until then, it's nice to be able to sit back and just relish in just how blessed you really are! ;)

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  13. i have seen the show a couple times, and the movie was beautiful, all but those raunchy sex scenes. that was a little crazy. but i am a charlotte as well. i relate to her alot too. but i also have to say that i do the same thing.
    i do not have a perfect life, many think i do, but i have my moments when i think the world is falling apart and realize i am being stupid. i am blesses out of my ears. and even if the world is falling apart, God has it in His hands, as He does me and you.

    i just hate when people tell me that my life is perfect. its not and i am not. i have problems like everyone else.

    and i love anberlin. i saw them on your little "listening to".
    i could die happy if i saw them in concert.
    =D

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  14. I STILL haven't seen that movie! I meant to use our free PPV on it but forgot. :P

    I can make you learn to love cosmos. They're my new fave drink.

    I try to be like Charlotte but I think I'm equal parts Carrie and Miranda with bits of Charlotte here and there, lol.

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  15. it'll never replace the spot bud light has claimed in your heart.

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  16. I've been reading your blog for some time now, and I remember a while ago thinking that you're such a Charlotte. And now even you think you're a Charlotte. But I don't think it's official until you take one of those "Which Sex & the City Character Are You?" quizzes.

    Personally, I thought the movie was far inferior to the series. The series is so much better. I think it's just all downhill now. One of the rumored sub-plots for the sequel is that Big is going to cheat on Carrie. I think that's a horrible plot! A woman can only take so much!

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  17. I don't know you in real life, but can already tell that yes, you are indeed a Charlotte. It's so funny how we all relate to these characters so well. One time, I was watching SATC with a guy friend and I was like, "I think I'm Carrie." He looked at me and said, "Every girl thinks they are Carrie. You are not Carrie. You are Miranda." What the heck is that supposed to mean? Oh well, I'll take her.

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  18. We haven't seen the movie yet, but we have watched the show. I relate to Charlotte the most too. There's nothing wrong with feeling blessed for what you have. You aren't bragging, you just aren't taking anything for granted, which is how everyone should live their lives. And wanna trade a cosmo for some wine? :)

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  19. Charlotte and Carrie are my most favorite characters out of 4 girls. If you're a Charlotte, then you're really really lucky :) It's nice to see life so positively like that and feel content.

    ps. You'll love cosmopolitans.

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  20. I am a Charlotte too! I am a hopeless romantic and feel bad sometimes when all my friends are complaining about their boyfriends or lack of, and I have no complaints! But I am very happy and lucky to be happy :)

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  21. I've never seen the show, but now I want to watch the movie!

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  22. I adore SATC. I don't believe in casual sex either, but that show is just fabulous. Especially for us single girls! My friends & I always talk about which character we are most like and I am definitely most like Miranda - career driven w/ a cynical/sarcastic sense of humor.

    I loved the movie! I went to it in the theater w/ 3 of my best friends and I probably cried through about a 1/3 of it!! I had just gone through a tough break up so alot of the movie just hit home for me. I am anxious to see the sequel but am not sure how they'll improve upon the first movie!!

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  23. I love SATC! The show, the movie, the characters, the fashion. Everything!

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  24. I tag you to do this meme:

    http://fab.typepad.com/fab/2009/04/my-style-in-one-picture.html

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  25. I am totally a Charlotte too. I am very much that good girl. Always have been. I love that the show/movie really allows you to identify with a character (or two). The show itself is more than just casual sex and cosmos. But cosmos? yum! They can be pretty strong though.

    :)

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  26. Glad you liked the movie! I enjoyed it as well but I have to say, I'd enjoy it a heck of a lot more if I WAS one of the characters. I can't really relate to any of them completely. I'm certainly not a Miranda or a Samantha - and I'm not really a Carrie or a Charlotte either.

    But that quote about being happy every day - I love it! I hope that's how it will be for me when I am married.

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  27. I think I'm like a weird mix of Carie and Charlotte...and I adored the same parts of the movie that you did. I feel that way with G, even if horrible things are happening around us or he "didn't do something right" I'm glad to be with him because of who he is and all that other mushy stuff. ;)

    P.S. Still not a big fan of cosmopolitans, tried them a few times and never got into them...

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  28. I am a HUGE SATC fan and the movie was fabulous. I'm so glad that you liked it. All of my friends are almost exactly like the characters. I love Charlotte for her personality the best but I personally relate to Carrie (but w/out the casual sex things). Glad you loved it and I'll take you up on that offer to have cosmos! :)

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  29. Aw- I loved that movie! I'm definitely a Charlotte, too. I'm single, but I have the same positive outlook on life and love. I recommend watching seasons of the show on DVD. You'll love her even more. There are so many moments throughout the episodes where you're all, "Aw, I love her." Thanks for sharing your post. :)

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  30. I am SO a Charlotte. You should rent the DVD's, you'd love them. The first season is focused more on sex and it's pretty blunt. As the seasons continue, the episodes become more and more relationship oriented.

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  31. I've have to say I alsl LOVED the Sex & the City movie as well.

    I've been a fan of the show from the very beginning. I think what few realize with SATC is that it is a show more about relationships than sex... yes there is a great deal of that in there too, but it's the relationships; the questioning of ourselves that makes the show so popular.

    Also, as you realized, we each can find a piece of the characters that we can relate to in some way or another.

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  32. Charlotte's my favourite too. If you watch JUST ONE episode of the actual show, it has to be the one where Harry proposes. It is so heartbreaking and beautiful and makes the world a lovely place.

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  33. i have no inner love for cosmopolitans or casual sex either.

    you are totally a charlotte. :)

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  34. Loved the show. Seriously, I own every season. Loved the movie. Own that too. I cried, squealed & laughed with it too.

    I wish I could be more of a Charlotte, but I'm more of a Carrie. Serial monogamist with a few dates in between, but for some reason, I always find that "bad apple."

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  35. Yea! I'm so happy you finally saw it:) I watched it this last Summer by myself and I had a similar experience...totally loved it.

    love you!

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  36. I always feel like such a prude when I am shocked by the nudity and sex in Sex & the City. :) I really liked the movie, too.

    And, of course, I've also been told that I'm a Charlotte. I hope I'm not as...ditzy and wide-eyed as her, though. ;)

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  37. I watched the show over the summer and fast-forwarded through the sex scenes.:) I'm 12. But I loved the clothes and big city life.

    I too feel guilty sometimes about being so happy, but I read a really great quote about how if you make "happily ever after and inside job, it doesn't have to be a myth," and that encouraged me. I think God wants us to take all of the blessings He gives and just SQUEEZE every last drop of joy out of them we can.:)

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  38. There are a lot of cosmos...and sex in Sex and the City, but that's not what it was ALL about....You totally need to sit back and watch the episodes. You'd enjoy!

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  39. how funny, I have only casually watched the show (the edited down versions on TBS) and just last week watched the movie and LOVED it. and I too was very challenged by Charlotte's general out look on life and gratefulness yet fearful trepidation on how it can't all be this good. But it is, if we look for it.

    any whoo. thanks for sharing.=)

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  40. I'm in the same boat as you. I haven't watched more than a full episode of SATC. I didn't get what everyone was talking about.

    I should rent it. Your entry made me want to see it

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  41. I am totally a Charlotte, too! The movie is great, the show is even better! Give it a chance you won't be dissappointed. I am NOT at all into casual sex or cosmo's, but I can relate to the show in many other ways. I know you will love it!
    You're Welcome (;

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  42. Like you, I never got on the SATC train. I've seen some of the edited episodes and I saw the movie... when a friend of mine emailed me one day in response to an email I had sent, she told me that I always remind her of Charlotte because of how I'm an "eternal optimist." I've seen a few more episodes now, and I have to say that I don't mind being compared to her. I think I really identify with her outlook on life.

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  43. i totally know what you mean and totally agree. especially when charlotte felt that life was going to well for her and had that lurking feeling, i have definitely experienced that and i hate it. i just wish i could accept things as they are and truly be happy without worrying.

    oh and i totally loved the movie too :)

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  44. Come to Vegas and I'll have you loving Cosmos in no time, promise.

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  45. i'm glad you finally saw the movie! i love it so much!

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  46. i love this post...because i completely sympathize.

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  47. I've never seen the movie but I think I might now. I may even watch the tv show. Judging by what you posted I think I'm probably a 'Charlotte' too if we get into characters =)

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  48. If you liked the movie, then you should definitely check out the show. It's mostly about the girls and their friendship, really. It probably won't make you want to drink cosmopolitans, but it will definitely make you want to move to New York and prance around in fancy shoes. It has that effect.

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  49. I feel like I could have wrote this blog myself. I never watched the show before, but LOVED the movie! And I'm much like Charlotte too. :)

    P.S. I found your blog through a friends, and enjoy your posts very much! Thanks!

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  50. 1. you are a total doll
    2. i am the carrie to yoru charlotte
    3. lets be the new "blog in the city" lb city that is
    4. i volunteer to be your cosmo friend!
    5. i'm sooo excited you are coming to book club!!!!!

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  51. I got called a "Miranda"... at first I kind of took offense to that because she comes off as a self righteous bitch sometimes. It was explained to me that I am independent, smart and motivated... I guess that's okay. :)

    P.S. I have to finish The Pleasure of My Company then I am beginning The Almost Moon. I love Sebold and I wish she would write another book...

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  52. Ok, first of all I'll share a cosmo with you! Second, GO BACK and watch the series and fall completely head over heels with Harry and Charlotte from the beginning (Which is actually later in the series, but watch it). And third... I left a little bloggy love for you at my place here. :)

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  53. I love this blog and I love that scene.

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  54. Great post, I love it. :)

    I'd never seen the TV programme but when I saw the film I remember thinking that I'm a Charlotte too.

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  55. I am new to your blog. I loved this post and can totally relate. I too am a Charlotte (right down to the pearls and sheath dresses). You must must must watch all 6 seasons of the show. You will see how each character develops. It is much more than just casual relationships and cosmos.
    I also appreciated your comments on your life; you certainly don't sound like you think you have a better life than others...rather, you are just grateful for what you have. Good for you. When you are faced with some obstacles (which undoubtedly you will), you will have solid backing and support.

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  56. I have never seen the movie, and I, too, have been called a Charlotte. I actually saw it and was thinking about putting it on my Netflix queue, but I've never seen the show before. Anyway, what I meant to say was that you described married life (to someone you love) so well! I'm a newlywed (Oct 08) and I love how you said it :)

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  57. I received the Sex and the City movie for my birthday last week and have yet to watch it. I have never seen a whole expisode of the show and don't really know what to expect. I was a bit sceptical but your blog has made me a whole lot more excited about seeing it! Thanks :)

    xxx

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