November 25, 2007

on fanmail...

Dear Bear Grylls,

You know, I was able to overlook the fact that you have done the following things in the past:

1. Drank the moisture from elephant poo.
2. Slept in a deer carcass.
3. Ate a camel spider like it was a chocolate chip cookie.

However, I simply can't wrap my mind around the fact that you're now telling me that if I am, in fact, stranded in the Sahara and running out of water, that it could come down to this:

"My only option, as of now, is to drink my own pee."

If it does, God forbid, come down to that, then I'm thinking that it would just be my time to go. Your option just crosses the line of decency. At that point, I think I'd have no problem just making my peace with the world and going to find a scorpion to put me out of my misery or something.

And I really shouldn't feel the need to dry heave while watching your show. Just keep that in mind.

(Just think of your wife. You do realize she watches the show, don't you? Have some respect.)



  1. hahaha! i love your letter to bear!

    i must have issues because even though he would - eeek - drink his own pee, or wrap a pee soaked shirt around his head in the desert, i still love him and think he is a total hottie. lord save me.

  2. I watched the Marathon and the one where he drank out of a dead camels stomach .... ugh... it still makes me want to barf just thinking about it.

  3. Hey there I enjoy reading your blog and have also seen your pics on flickr. I love your envelopes!

    Oh and I've never seen the show, it sounds fascinating =p

  4. Oh I saw that episode! Twice actually!

    I heart Bear Grylls. Too bad he's married. And so am I.


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